Asteroid Misses Earth in 2024, Biden and Trump Still Around as Fans Unite Over Baylor Swoncé
• An asteroid won't destroy Earth in 2024, instead we'll be stuck with a 77-year-old con artist running for president against an 81-year-old • The Philadelphia Eagles will claim they won the 2024 Super Bowl despite not playing in it • An AI will fuse Beyoncé and Taylor Swift into one superstar named Baylor Swoncé to unite their fanbases • Joe Biden will continue to age and Donald Trump will continue to be the worst • Vegans will finally start eating normal food like the rest of us